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KINDNESS WISDOM

Reflection for ANZAC Day

Let us use ANZAC Day to commit ourselves to be agents of reconciliation.

Reflection for ANZAC Day
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KINDNESS WISDOM

Kindness ~ Wisdom

We can’t change the past it either breaks us or makes us different.

The journeys we all travel through time is evolution.

Do we have to change, no? But it does change us.

It’s our choices we make is our responsibility therefore always be kind to you too.

DON’T hurt others with your actions.

We only pass this way once in a lifetime.

Charity starts under your roof when you turn lights off. When you wake, you will feel loved and cherished by those under your care.

Loved and cherished only found in the life of independence, freedom and grace in your family.

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KINDNESS WISDOM

Written for all little girls ๐Ÿ’ƒ

What every mother and daughter should read!!!
I felt like I had written some of this. Who else felt that way after reading this?

Dear Daughter,
As you navigate the choppy waters of womanhood (and damn, those are some high, white-capped swells), please, oh please, hear my voice, my love.

Hear it, sweet child. Please donโ€™t shrug me off.

Hear it ringing through the din, right through these confounding, life-sorting years; right past your indifference, your boredom with me, your toiling, your angst, your confusion, and your fears.

I am your mama, and mama just knows.

Be a badass truth teller and say what you mean. The truth has been scary sh*t since the beginning of time, but, my darling, the truth wins. Trust me.

In the end, the truth always makes a dramatic, plot-twisting, unapologetic entrance.

Be just as discerning with your โ€œyes,โ€ as you are with you โ€œno.โ€ Figure out when itโ€™s time to stay and fight a good, earnest fight, and when to just let go.

Eat half the slice of pie, half the cake, half the saucy appetizer, and half the cheesy macaroni bake. And donโ€™t be huffy about this, daughter, because sons should indeed take heed too. This is not the โ€œplight of a womanโ€โ€”but take care of your body so it will take care of you.

Unless you really want it! If you want it, then eat it, for goodness sake. Lick your fingers clean, savor every last bite, and for the love of all things holy, give the rules a break.

Remember to love yourself. Enjoy every bit. Love your whole, real selfโ€”despite every perceived imperfection, mistake, or failure, despite every self-manufactured hit.

Love who you are, what you stand for. Keep the fire inside yourself lit.

Your health, and the care, and the keeping of you is the most important component to every part of your happiness.

Trust me. Mamaโ€™s been there. Mama knows.

Compromise, my dear, but donโ€™t give yourself away. Say what you mean, and mean what you say.

Take a quiet moment, be present, and pray. Pray for peace and equality, but include yourself along the way. Answer to yourself without regrets, every blessed day.

Live your life. And by live, I mean fulfill every last human need. Sprinkle some kindness, and watch others follow your lead. Call out hypocrisy, injustice, malice, and greed.

Know how to listen, child. Winning is good, but other people know things too. Itโ€™s not just about what you say, itโ€™s about what you do.

Learn from others, and their different point of view.

Watch out for creeps and call them out. Loudly, publiclyโ€”donโ€™t be afraid to shout! Creeps fester and grow like weeds when left unchallenged.

And by creeps, Iโ€™m talking about the Harveyโ€™s, the Billโ€™s, the Dilon’s and the Charlieโ€™s. The Mattโ€™s, the Jeffreyโ€™s, the Royโ€™s, and the Brettโ€™s.

Oh yeah, and the Donaldโ€™s. Men with money think money is the answer.

Follow your heart, but make sure your head is screwed on straight. If it isnโ€™t, loosen the screws and adjust accordingly until it is, my love.

Sexual satisfaction means telling your partner what you want and exactly how you want it, instead of just lying there and hoping what you want miraculously โ€œhappens.โ€ Sexual satisfaction means you donโ€™t fake it โ€™til you make it, my dear.

Disappointment in the sack is your fault. Thatโ€™s right, I said it. Take control of your own pleasure. Own it. You deserve to feel good as much as your partner does.

Oh, and donโ€™t be the only one who cleans the damn house. Make it clear from the beginning that a tidy living space is a straight-up shared job. Same goes for cooking. And laundry. And lawn mowing. And garbage. And bill paying.

Make a f*cking chore chart the first week of cohabitation and donโ€™t say things like, โ€œIโ€™m sorry, but you have to help too.โ€ Resentment festers when left unchecked.

Donโ€™t be snarky, my love. Sarcasm is too easy and solves nothing. Put your thoughts together and just be direct.

Yes, you do need a haircut. Yes, get the chunky necklace you love and might only wear once. Treat yourself to small self-care things that make you feel good. Love yourself this way. It will make you feel rich instead of cheap; worthy for the front, instead of the backseat.

Keep tabs on your judgement. No one likes a judge, sweet girl. Empathy and compassion will boomerang back your way when you need it the most.

Keep promises. Promises kept, just like conviction, will stick to your character and follow you wherever you go.

Breathe. Be kind. Inhale and exhale compassion on every level.

And oh, and for heavenโ€™s sake, wear sunscreen! What do you wantโ€ฆwrinkles when youโ€™re 35?

Please save some money, honey. Itโ€™s called a โ€œfreedom account,โ€ and wise, old, rich women do this when theyโ€™re young.

Invest in real estate. Buy a used car. One bottle of perfume is enough.

Stay away from the Targets and the TJs, the Starbucks and the Kohlโ€™s, Wharehouse and K-Mart.
Youโ€™ll thank me later when youโ€™re happily counting bankrolls.

Trust me. Money is independence. Itโ€™s not the key to everything, for sure, but itโ€™s undoubtedly a ticket for the choices youโ€™ll make and the options youโ€™ll take. Men have known this forever.

Dear sweet daughter. Live your life. Let me rephrase that: Live your life.

And, smash the patriarchy while youโ€™re at it.

Now, please take mama out for a mojito.

Mama needs to see your beautiful face.

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KINDNESS WISDOM QUOTES

Thoughts for today ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ Elvis Presley ๐Ÿ˜

Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too

They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target

By the time a man realizes that his father was right, he has a son who thinks heโ€™s wrong

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KINDNESS WISDOM

Hello Friends,โšœ๏ธโšœ๏ธ

Wishing everyone a fantastic day!!
Believing in yourself and having self-compassion are very important for personal growth and development.
When we believe in ourselves we become unstoppable. Imagine knowing that whatever you set out to do you can and will accomplish your goals. That is very powerful. Even when faced with huge obstacles and problems you know that eventually you will overcome them.

Having self-compassion is what tells us that we are human and we are prone to making mistakes. We all say and do things that are not always appropriate and it is important to realize that is okay. We need to be able to say to ourselves when we make mistakes, that is okay and that it was not so bad. Have compassion for ourselves.
Sending everyone Positive Vibes and Love. Peace and Love, Kindness โšœ๏ธ

You’re just gotta dance like no one is watching. Love like you have never been hurt. Sing like nobodies listening. Live like it’s heaven on earth

Kindness ~ Wisdom โšœ๏ธ
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KINDNESS WISDOM

Thoughts of Today ๐Ÿ•Š๐Ÿ•Š

A man is as old as he’s feeling, a woman is as old as she looks.

Someย people come into your life, and you just know you will never be able to replace them if they left.

Toย be around those who enhance your life is called success. To enhance the lives of those around you is called significance.

Fromย all the toys in the world, people choose feelings to play with

Beย with people who always show you your strength and hopes and not waste time with people who always remind you of your failures and mistakes.

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KINDNESS WISDOM

Harness Creative Thinking


โ€œThe joy is in creating, not maintaining.โ€ โ€”VINCE LOMBARDI, NFL HALL OF FAME COACHย 

Creativity is pure gold, no matter what you do for a living. Annette Moser-Well man, author of The Five Faces of Genius, asserts, โ€œThe most valuable resource you bring to your work and to your firm is your creativity. More than what you get done, more than the role you play, more than your title, more than your โ€˜outputโ€™โ€”itโ€™s your ideas that matter.โ€ ย Despite the importance of a personโ€™s ability to think with creativity, few people seem to possess the skill in abundance.ย 

If youโ€™re not as creative as you would like to be, you can change your way of thinking. Creative thinking isnโ€™t necessarily original thinking. In fact, I think people mythologize original thought. Most often, creative thinking is a composite of other thoughts discovered along the way. Even the great artists, whom we consider highly original, learned from their masters, modeled their work on that of others, and brought together a host of ideas and styles to create their own work. Study art, and you will see threads that run through the work of all artists and artistic movements, connecting them to other artists who went before them.ย 

CHARACTERISTICS OF CREATIVE THINKERS


Perhaps youโ€™re not even sure what I mean when I ask whether you are a creative thinker. Consider some characteristics that creative thinkers have in common:ย 

Creative Thinkers Value Ideas


Annette Moser-Wellman observes, โ€œHighly creative people are dedicated to ideas. They donโ€™t rely on their talent alone; they rely on their discipline. Their imagination is like a second skin. They know how to manipulate it to its fullest.โ€ Creativity is about having ideasโ€”lots of them. You will have ideas only if you value ideas.ย 

Creative Thinkers Explore Options


Iโ€™ve yet to meet a creative thinker who didnโ€™t love options. Exploring a multitude of possibilities helps to stimulate the imagination, and imagination is crucial to creativity. As Albert Einstein put it, โ€œImagination is more important than knowledge.โ€ People who know me well will tell you that I place a very high value on options. Why? Because they provide the key to finding the best answerโ€”not the only answer. Good thinkers come up with the best answers. They create back-up plans that provide them with alternatives. They enjoy freedom that others do not possess. And they will influence and lead others.ย 

Creative Thinkers Embrace Ambiguity


Writer H. L. Mencken said, โ€œIt is the dull man who is always sure, and the sure man who is always dull.โ€ Creative people donโ€™t feel the need to stamp out uncertainty. They see all kinds of inconsistencies and gaps in life, and they often take delight in exploring those gapsโ€”or in using their imagination to fill them in.ย 

Creative Thinkers Celebrate the Offbeat


Creativity, by its very nature, often explores off of the beaten path and goes against the grain. Diplomat and long-time president of Yale University King-man Brewster said, โ€œThere is a correlation between the creative and the screwball. So we must suffer the screwball gladly.โ€ To foster creativity in yourself or others, be willing to tolerate a little oddness.ย 

Creative Thinkers Connect the Unconnected


Because creativity utilizes the ideas of others, thereโ€™s great value in being able to connect one idea to anotherโ€”especially to seemingly unrelated ideas. Graphic designer Tim Hansen says, โ€œCreativity is especially expressed in the ability to make connections, to make associations, to turn things around and express them in a new way.โ€ Creating additional thoughts is like taking a trip in your car. You may know where you are going, but only as you move toward your destination can you see and experience things in a way not possible before you started. Creative thinking works something like this:ย 

THINK _ COLLECT _ CREATE _ CORRECT _ CONNECT


Once you begin to think, you are free to collect. You ask yourself, What material relates to this thought? Once you have the material, you ask, What ideas can make the thought better? That can start to take an idea to the next level. After that, you can correct or refine it by asking, What changes can make these ideas better? Finally, you connect the ideas by positioning them in the right context to make the thought complete and powerful.ย 

Creative Thinkers Donโ€™t Fear Failure


Creativity demands the ability to be unafraid of failure because creativity equals failure. You may be surprised to hear such a statement, but itโ€™s true. Charles Frankel asserts that โ€œanxiety is the essential condition of intellectual and artistic creation.โ€ Creativity requires a willingness to look stupid. It means getting out on a limbโ€”knowing that the limb often breaks! Creative people know these things and still keep searching for new ideas. They just donโ€™t let the ideas that donโ€™t work prevent them from coming up with more ideas that do work.ย 

WHY YOU SHOULD DISCOVER THE JOY OF CREATIVE THINKING


Creativity can improve a personโ€™s quality of life. Here are five specific things creative thinking has the potential to do for you:ย 

1. Creative Thinking Adds Value to Everything


Wouldnโ€™t you enjoy a limitless reservoir of ideas that you could draw upon at any time? Thatโ€™s what creative thinking gives you. For that reason, no matter what you are currently able to do, creativity can increase your capabilities. Creativity is being able to see what everybody else has seen and think what nobody else has thought so that you can do what nobody else has done. Sometimes creative thinking lies along the lines of invention, where you break new ground. Other times it moves along the lines of innovation, which helps you to do old things in a new way. But either way, itโ€™s seeing the world through sufficiently new eyes so that new solutions appear. That always adds value.ย 

2. Creative Thinking Compounds


Over the years, Iโ€™ve found thatย 

Creative Thinking Is Hard Workย 

butย 

Creative Thinking Compounds Given Enoughย 

Time and Focusย 

Perhaps more than any other kind of thinking, creative thinking builds on itself and increases the creativity of the thinker. Poet Maya Angelou observed, โ€œYou canโ€™t use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have. Sadly, too often creativity is smothered rather than nurtured. There has to be a climate in which new ways of thinking, perceiving, questioning are encouraged.โ€ If you cultivate creative thinking in an environment that nurtures creativity, thereโ€™s no telling what kind of ideas you can come up with. (Iโ€™ll talk more on that later.)ย 

3. Creative Thinking Draws People to You and Your Ideas


Creativity is intelligence having fun. People admire intelligence, and they are always attracted to funโ€”so the combination is fantastic. If anyone could be said to have fun with his intelligence, it was Leonardo da Vinci. The diversity of his ideas and expertise staggers the mind. He was a painter, architect, sculptor, anatomist, musician, inventor, and engineer. The term Renaissance man was coined because of him. Just as people were drawn to Da Vinci and his ideas during the Renaissance, they are drawn to creative people today. If you cultivate creativity, you will become more attractive to other people, and they will be drawn to you.ย 

4. Creative Thinking Helps You Learn More


Author and creativity expert Ernie Zelinski says, โ€œCreativity is the joy of not knowing it all. The joy of not knowing it all refers to the realization that we seldom if ever have all the answers; we always have the ability to generate more solutions to just about any problem. Being creative is being able to see or imagine a great deal of opportunity to lifeโ€™s problems. Creativity is having options.โ€ 5 It almost seems too obvious to say, but if you are always actively seeking new ideas, you will learn. Creativity is teachability. Itโ€™s seeing more solutions than problems. And the greater the quantity of thoughts, the greater the chance for learning something new.ย 

5. Creative Thinking Challenges the Status Quo


If you desire to improve your worldโ€”or even your own situationโ€”then creativity will help you. The status quo and creativity are incompatible. Creativity and innovation always walk hand in hand.ย 

HOW TO DISCOVER THE JOY OF CREATIVE THINKING


At this point you may be saying, โ€œOkay, Iโ€™m convinced that creative thinking is important. But how do I find the creativity within me? How do I discover the joy of creative thought?โ€ Here are five ways to do it:ย 

1. Remove Creativity Killersย 


Economics professor and humor author Stephen Leacock said, โ€œPersonally, I would sooner have written Alice in Wonderland than the whole Encyclopedia Britannica.โ€ He valued the warmth of creativity over cold facts. If you do too, then you need to eliminate attitudes that devalue creative thinking. Take a look at the following phrases. They are almost guaranteed to kill creative thinking any time you hear (or think) them:ย 

  • Iโ€™m Not a Creative Personย 
  • Follow the Rulesย 
  • Donโ€™t Ask Questionsย 
  • Donโ€™t Be Differentย 
  • Stay Within the Linesย 
  • There Is Only One Way
  • Donโ€™t Be Foolishย 
  • Be Practicalย 
  • Be Seriousย 
  • Think of Your Imageย 
  • Thatโ€™s Not Logicalย 
  • Itโ€™s Not Practicalย 
  • Itโ€™s Never Been Doneย 
  • It Canโ€™t Be Doneย 
  • It Didnโ€™t Work for Themย 
  • We Tried That Beforeย 
  • Itโ€™s Too Much Workย 
  • We Canโ€™t Afford to Make a Mistakeย 
  • It Will Be Too Hard to Administerย 
  • We Donโ€™t Have the Timeย 
  • We Donโ€™t Have the Moneyย 
  • Yes, Butโ€ฆย 
  • Play Is Frivolousย 
  • Failure Is Finalย 

If you think you have a great idea, donโ€™t let anyone talk you out of it even if it sounds foolish. Donโ€™t let yourself or anyone else subject you to creativity killers. After all, you canโ€™t do something new and exciting if you force yourself to stay in the same old rut. Donโ€™t just work harder at the same old thing. Make a change.ย 

2. Think Creatively by Asking the Right Questions


Creativity is largely a matter of asking the right questions. Management trainer Sir Antony Jay said, โ€œThe un-creative mind can spot wrong answers, but it takes a creative mind to spot wrong questions.โ€ Wrong questions shut down the process of creative thinking. They direct thinkers down the same old path, or they chide them into believing that thinking isnโ€™t necessary at all. To stimulate creative thinking, ask yourself questions such asโ€ฆย 

  • Why must it be done this way?ย 
  • What is the root problem?ย 
  • What are the underlying issues?ย 
  • What does this remind me of?ย 
  • What is the opposite?ย 
  • What metaphor or symbol helps to explain it?ย 
  • Why is it important?ย 
  • Whatโ€™s the hardest or most expensive way to do it?ย 
  • Who has a different perspective on this?ย 
  • What happens if we donโ€™t do it at all?ย 

You get the ideaโ€”and you can probably come up with better questions yourself. Physicist Tom Hirschfield observed, โ€œIf you donโ€™t ask, โ€˜Why this?โ€™ often enough, somebody will ask, โ€˜Why you?โ€™โ€ If you want to think creatively, you must ask good questions. You must challenge the process.ย 

3. Develop a Creative Environment


Charlie Brower said, โ€œA new idea is delicate. It can be killed by a sneer or a yawn; it can be stabbed to death by a quip and worried to death by a frown on the right manโ€™s brow.โ€ Negative environments kill thousands of great ideas every minute. A creative environment, on the other hand, becomes like a greenhouse where ideas get seeded, sprout up,and flourish. A creative environment:ย 

  • Encourages Creativity:ย David Hills says, โ€œStudies of creativity suggest that the biggest single variable of whether or not employees will be creative is whether they perceive they have permission.โ€ When innovation and good thinking are openly encouraged and rewarded, then people see that they have permission to be creative.ย 
  • Places a High Value on Trust among Team Members and Individuality:ย Creativity always risks failure. Thatโ€™s why trust is so important to creative people. In the creative process, trust comes from people working together, from knowing that people on the team have experience launching successful, creative ideas, and from the assurance that creative ideas wonโ€™t go to waste, because they will be implemented.ย 
  • Embraces Those Who Are Creative:ย Creative people celebrate the offbeat. How should creative people be treated? I take the advice of Tom Peters: โ€œWeed out the dullardsโ€”nurture the nuts!โ€ I do that by spending time with them, which I enjoy anyway. I especially like to pull people into brainstorming sessions. People look forward to an invitation to such meetings because the time will be filled with energy, ideas, and laughter. And the odds are high that a new project, seminar, or business strategy will result. When that happens, they also know a partyโ€™s coming!ย 
  • Focuses on Innovation, Not Just Invention:ย Sam Weston, creator of the popular action figure GI Joe, said, โ€œTruly groundbreaking ideas are rare, but you donโ€™t necessarily need one to make a career out of creativity. My definition of creativity is the logical combination of two or more existing elements that result in a new concept. The best way to make a living with your imagination is to develop innovative applications, not imagine completely new concepts.โ€ Creative people say, โ€œGive me a good idea and Iโ€™ll give you a better idea!โ€ย 
  • Is Willing to Let People Go Outside the Lines:ย Most people automatically stay within lines, even if those lines have been arbitrarily drawn or are terribly out of date. Remember, most limitations we face are not imposed on us by others; we place them on ourselves. Lack of creativity often falls into that category. If you want to be more creative, challenge boundaries. Inventor Charles Ket-tering said, โ€œAll human development, no matter what form it takes, must be outside the rules; otherwise, we would never have anything new.โ€ A creative environment takes that into account.ย 
  • Appreciates the Power of a Dream:ย A creative environment promotes the freedom of a dream. A creative environment encourages the use of a blank sheet of paper and the question, โ€œIf we could draw a picture of what we want to accomplish, what would that look like?โ€ A creative environment allowed Martin Luther King, Jr., to speak with passion and declare to millions, โ€œI have a dream,โ€ not โ€œI have a goal.โ€ Goals may give focus, but dreams give power. Dreams expand the world. That is why James Allen suggested that โ€œdreamers are the saviors of the world.โ€ The more creativity-friendly you can make your environment, the more potential it has to become creative.ย 

4. Spend Time with Other Creative Peopleย 


What if the place you work has an environment hostile to creativity, and you possess little ability to change it? One possibility is to change jobs. But what if you desire to keep working there despite the negative environment? Your best option is to find a way to spend time with other creative people. Creativity is contagious. Have you ever noticed what happens during a good brainstorming session? One person throws out an idea. Another person uses it as a springboard to discover another idea. Someone else takes it in yet another, even better direction. Then somebody grabs hold of it and takes it to a whole new level. The interplay of ideas can be electric. I have a strong group of creative individuals in my life. I make sure to spend regular time with them. When I leave them, I always feel energized, Iโ€™m full of ideas, and I see things differently. They truly are indispensable to my life. Itโ€™s a fact that you begin to think like the people you spend a lot of time with. The more time you can spend with creative people engaging in creative activities, the more creative you will become.

5. Get Out of Your Box


Actress Katharine Hepburn remarked, โ€œIf you obey all the rulesโ€ฆ you will miss all the fun.โ€ While I donโ€™t think itโ€™s necessary to break all the rules (many are in place to protect us), I do think itโ€™s unwise to allow self-imposed limitations to hinder us. Creative thinkers know that they must repeatedly break out of the โ€œboxโ€ of their own history and personal limitations in order to experience creative breakthroughs. The most effective way to help yourself get out of the box is to expose yourself to new paradigms. One way you can do that is by traveling to new places. Explore other cultures, countries, and traditions. Find out how people very different from you live and think. Another is to read on new subjects. Iโ€™m naturally curious and love to learn, but I still have a tendency to read books only on my favorite subjects, such as leadership. I sometimes have to force myself to read books that broaden my thinking, because I know itโ€™s worth it. If you want to break out of your own box, get into somebodyโ€™s elseโ€™s. Read broadly.ย 

Many people mistakenly believe that if individuals arenโ€™t born with creativity, they will never be creative. But you can see from the many strategies and examples Iโ€™ve given that creativity can be cultivated in the right supportive environment.ย 


Thinking Question

Am I working to break out of my โ€œboxโ€ of limitations so that I explore ideas and options to experience creative breakthroughs?

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KINDNESS WISDOM

โ€œIโ€™m not an answering machine, Iโ€™m a questioning machine. If we have all the answers, howcome weโ€™re in such a mess?โ€ โ€”DOUGLAS CARDINAL

Question Popular Thinking


ย Economist John Maynard Keynes, whose ideas profoundly influenced economic theory and practices in the twentieth century, asserted, โ€œThe difficulty lies not so much in developing new ideas as in escaping from the old ones.โ€ Going against popular thinking can be difficult, whether youโ€™re a businessperson bucking company tradition, a pastor introducing new types of music to his church, a new mother rejecting old wivesโ€™ tales handed down from her parents, or a teenager ignoring currently popular styles.ย 

Many of the ideas in this book go against popular thinking. If you value popularity over good thinking, then you will severely limit your potential to learn the types of thinking encouraged by this book.ย 

Popular thinking isโ€ฆย 

  • Too Average to Understand the Value of Good Thinking,ย 
  • Too Inflexible to Realize the Impact of Changed Thinking,ย 
  • Too Lazy to Master the Process of Intentional Thinking,ย 
  • Too Small to See the Wisdom of Big-picture Thinking,ย 
  • Too Satisfied to Unleash the Potential of Focused Thinking,ย 
  • Too Traditional to Discover the Joy of Creative Thinking,ย 
  • Too Naive to Recognize the Importance of Realistic Thinking,
  • Too Undisciplined to Release the Power of Strategic Thinking,
  • ย Too Limiting to Feel the Energy of Possibility Thinking,ย 
  • Too Trendy to Embrace the Lessons of Reflective Thinking,ย 
  • Too Shallow to Question the Acceptance of Popular Thinking,ย 
  • Too Proud to Encourage the Participation of Shared Thinking,ย 
  • Too Self-absorbed to Experience the Satisfaction of Unselfish Thinking, andย 
  • Too Uncommitted to Enjoy the Return of Bottom-Line Thinking.ย 

If you want to become a good thinker, then start preparing yourself for the possibility of becoming unpopular.ย 

WHY YOU SHOULD QUESTION THE ACCEPTANCE OF POPULAR THINKING


Iโ€™ve given you some broad reasons for questioning the acceptance of popular thinking. Now allow me to be more specific:ย 

1. Popular Thinking Sometimes Means Not Thinkingย 

My friend Kevin Myers sums up the idea of popular thinking by saying, โ€œThe problem with popular thinking is that it doesnโ€™t require you to think at all.โ€ Good thinking is hard work. If it were easy, everybody would be a good thinker. Unfortunately, many people try to live life the easy way. They donโ€™t want to do the hard work of thinking or pay the price of success. Itโ€™s easier to do what other people do and hope that they thought it out. Look at the stock market recommendations of some experts. By the time they publish their picks, most are following a trend, not creating one or even riding its crest. The people who are going to make money on the stocks they recommend have already done so by the time the general public hears about it. When people blindly follow a trend, theyโ€™re not doing their own thinking.

2. Popular Thinking Offers False Hopeย 

Benno Muller-Hill, a professor in the University of Cologne genetics department, tells how one morning in high school he stood last in a line of forty students in the schoolyard. His physics teacher had set up a telescope so that his students could view a planet and its moons. The first student stepped up to the telescope. He looked through it, but when the teacher asked if he could see anything, the boy said no;ย 

his nearsightedness hampered his view. The teacher showed him how to adjust the focus, and the boy finally said he could see the planet and moons. One by one, the students stepped up to the telescope and saw what they were supposed to see. Finally, the second to last student looked into the telescope and announced that he could not see anything.ย 

โ€œYou idiot,โ€ shouted the teacher, โ€œyou have to adjust the lenses.โ€ The student tried, but he finally said, โ€œI still canโ€™t see anything. It is all black.โ€ 

The teacher, disgusted, looked through the telescope himself, and then looked up with a strange expression. The lens cap still covered the telescope. None of the students had been able to see anything!  Many people look for safety and security in popular thinking. They figure that if a lot of people are doing something, then it must be right. It must be a good idea. 

If most people accept it, then it probably represents fairness, equality, compassion, and sensitivity, right? Not necessarily. Popular thinking said the earth was the center of the universe, yet Copernicus studied the stars and planets and proved mathematically that the earth and the other planets in our solar system revolved around the sun. 

Popular thinking said surgery didnโ€™t require clean instruments, yet Joseph Lister studied the high death rates in hospitals and introduced antiseptic practices that immediately saved lives. Popular thinking said that women shouldnโ€™t have the right to vote, yet people like Emmeline Pankhurst and Susan B. Anthony fought for and won that right. Popular thinking put the Nazis into power in Germany, yet Hitlerโ€™s regime murdered millions and nearly destroyed Europe. We must always remember there is a huge difference between acceptance and intelligence. People may say that thereโ€™s safety in numbers, but thatโ€™s not always true. Sometimes itโ€™s painfully obvious that popular thinking isnโ€™t good and right. 

Other times itโ€™s less evident. For example, consider the staggering number of people in the United States who have run up large amounts of debt on their credit cards. Anyone who is financially astute will tell you thatโ€™s a bad idea. Yet millions follow right along with the popular thinking of buy now, pay later. And so they pay, and pay, and pay. Many promises of popular thinking ring hollow. Donโ€™t let them fool you. 

3. Popular Thinking Is Slow to Embrace Change 

Popular thinking loves the status quo. It puts its confidence in the idea of the moment, and holds on to it with all its might. As a result, it resists change and dampens innovation. Donald M. Nelson, former president of the Society of Independent Motion Picture Producers, criticized popular thinking when he asserted, โ€œWe must discard the idea that past routine, past ways of doing things, are probably the best ways. On the contrary, we must assume that there is probably a better way to do almost everything. We must stop assuming that a thing which has never been done before probably cannot be done at all.โ€ 

4. Popular Thinking Brings Only Average Results 

The bottom line? Popular thinking brings mediocre results. Here is popular thinking in a nutshell: Popular = Normal = Average Itโ€™s the least of the best and the best of the least. We limit our success when we adopt popular thinking. It represents putting in the least energy to just get by. You must reject common thinking if you want to accomplish uncommon results. 

HOW TO QUESTION THE ACCEPTANCE OF POPULAR THINKING


Popular thinking has often proved to be wrong and limiting. Questioning it isnโ€™t necessarily hard, once you cultivate the habit of doing so. The difficulty is in getting started. Begin by doing the following things:

1. Think Before You Follow 

Many individuals follow others almost automatically. Sometimes they do so because they desire to take the path of least resistance. Other times they fear rejection. Or they believe thereโ€™s wisdom in doing what everyone else does. But if you want to succeed, you need to think about whatโ€™s best, not whatโ€™s popular. Challenging popular thinking requires a willingness to be unpopular and go outside of the norm. 

Following the tragedy of September 11, 2001, for example, few people willingly chose to travel by plane. But that was the best time to travel: crowds were down, security was up, and airlines were cutting prices. About a month after the tragedy, my wife, Margaret, and I heard that Broadway shows had lots of seats and many New York hotel rooms remained empty. Popular thinking said, stay away from New York. 

We used that as an opportunity. We got cheap plane tickets to the city, booked a room in a great hotel for about half price, and got tickets to the most sought-after show: The Producers. As we took our seats in the theater, we sat next to a woman beside herself with excitement. 

โ€œI canโ€™t believe Iโ€™m finally here,โ€ she said to us. โ€œIโ€™ve waited so long. This is the best show on Broadway โ€”and the hardest to get tickets to.โ€ Then she turned to look me in the eye and said, โ€œIโ€™ve had my tickets for a year and a half, waiting to see this show. How long ago did you get yours?โ€ โ€œYou wonโ€™t like my answer,โ€ I replied. โ€œOh, come on,โ€ she said. โ€œHow long?โ€ โ€œI got mine five days ago,โ€ 

I answered. She looked at us in horror. By the way, she was right. Itโ€™s one of the best shows weโ€™ve seen in a while. And we got to see it only because we were willing to go against popular thinking when everyone else was staying at home. As you begin to think against the grain of popular thinking, remind yourself that 

  • Unpopular thinking, even when resulting in success, is largely underrated, unrecognized, and misunderstood. 
  • Unpopular thinking contains the seeds of vision and opportunity. 
  • Unpopular thinking is required for all progress. 

The next time you feel ready to conform to popular thinking on an issue, stop and think. You may not want to create change for its own sake, but you certainly donโ€™t want to blindly follow just because you havenโ€™t thought about whatโ€™s best. 

2. Appreciate Thinking Different from Your Own 

One of the ways to embrace innovation and change is to learn to appreciate how others think. To do that, you must continually expose yourself to people different from yourself. My brother, Larry Maxwellโ€”a good businessman and an innovative thinkerโ€”continually challenges popular thinking by thinking differently. He says: Most of our people in sales and middle management come from businesses with products and services different from ours. 

That constantly exposes us to new ways of thinking. We also discourage our people from active participation in formal business and trade associations and fraternities because their thinking is quite common. They donโ€™t need to spend lots of time thinking the way everyone else in the industry does. 

As you strive to challenge popular thinking, spend time with people with different backgrounds, education levels, professional experiences, personal interests, etc. You will think like the people with whom you spend the most time. If you spend time with people who think out of the box, youโ€™re more likely to challenge popular thinking and break new ground. 

3. Continually Question Your Own Thinking 

Letโ€™s face it, any time we find a way of thinking that works, one of our greatest temptations is to go back toit repeatedly, even if it no longer works well. The greatest enemy to to-morrowโ€™s success is sometimes todayโ€™s success. My friend Andy Stanley recently taught a leadership lesson at INJOYโ€™s Catalyst Conference called โ€œChallenging the Process.โ€ He described how progress must be preceded by change, and he pointed out many of the dynamics involved in questioning popular thinking. In an organization, he said, we should remember that every tradition was originally a good ideaโ€”and perhaps even revolutionary. But every tradition may not be a good idea for the future. In your organization, if you were involved in putting into place what currently exists, then itโ€™s likely that you will resist changeโ€”even change for the better. Thatโ€™s why itโ€™s important to challenge your own thinking. If youโ€™re too attached to your own thinking and how everything is done now, then nothing will change for the better. 

4. Try New Things in New Ways 

When was the last time you did something for the first time? Do you avoid taking risks or trying new things? One of the best ways to get out of the rut of your own thinking is to innovate. You can do that in little, everyday ways: drive to work a different way from normal. Order an unfamiliar dish at your favorite restaurant. Ask a different colleague to help you with a familiar project. Take yourself off of autopilot. Unpopular thinking asks questions and seeks options. In 1997, my three companies moved to Atlanta, Georgia. Itโ€™s a great city, but traffic at peak times can get crazy. Immediately after moving here, I began looking for and testing alternative routes to desired destinations so that I would not be caught in traffic. From my house to the airport, for example, I have discovered and used nine routes within eight miles and twelve minutes from one another. Often I am amazed to see people sitting on the freeway when they could be moving forward on an alternative route. What is the problem? Too many people have not tried new things in new ways. It is true: most people are more satisfied with old problems than committed to finding new solutions. How you go about doing new things in new ways is not as important as making sure you do it. (Besides, if you try to do new things in the same way that everyone else does, are you really going against popular thinking? ) Get out there and do something different today. 

5. Get Used to Being Uncomfortable 

When it comes right down to it, popular thinking is comfortable. Itโ€™s like an old recliner adjusted to all the ownerโ€™s idiosyncrasies. The problem with most old recliners is that no one has looked at them lately. If so, theyโ€™d agree that itโ€™s time to get a new one! If you want to reject popular thinking in order to embrace achievement, youโ€™ll have to get used to being uncomfortable. If you embrace unpopular thinking and make decisions based upon what works best and what is right rather than what is commonly accepted, know this: in your early years you wonโ€™t be as wrong as people think you are. 

In your later years, you wonโ€™t be as right as people think you are. And all through the years, you will be better than you thought you could be. 


Thinking Question 

Am I consciously rejecting the limitations of common thinking in order to accomplish uncommon results?