“WHIPPED!” a poem a.k.a.: “Scourged!” or “WHY IT’S NOT THE BEST IDEA TO JUST LISTEN TO & OBEY YOUR WIFE OR GIRLFRIEND’S ADVICE!” 1-5-19 [W]
A Post-Easter Consideration!
We all know some folks, who-just-won’t-rest will-not-rest, UN-TIL,
They’ve criticized ANY decision you’ve made or they’ve climbed the highest hill,
Just to prove that-your-DECISION WAS-WRONG, quite ill-conceived!
You-know? I know some wives and girlfriends who-are never, ever “relieved,”
Until they ANAL-yze what you did, and, then, ask the question: “WHY?
DIDN’T YOU DO IT SOME OTHER WAY!?” Such people [can] make me cry!
As-a-for-instance (pause) What IF, ON EASTER MORNING, things were mo-di-fied,
And The Woman showed up – at The Tomb, and she simply would-NOT abide,
WITH JESUS’ DECISION TO COME OUT? It might-a gone something like this:
? So, Easter Morning, Jesus walked OUT, looking to maybe get a kiss,
And there was His girl, with tears in her eyes!
She-was-startled, but-definitely-liked PERMANENT-Good-byes,
So she immediately said: “What in The Hell? – – – Jesus, my man, I just got-to tell,
YOU, that-THIS-IS-FREAKY! You’re-a-dead, walking guy!
You-just gotta go back in there – and I’m telling you why! (pause)
This SILLY decision of YOURS – to-simply RE-SURRECT [an annoying gasp!]
Is SO bizarre! Are you a kook? How could you really elect,
To break with Jewish tradition! Oy vey! WHEN-YOU-DIE, YOU-REST,
YOU DON’T JUST GET UP A FEW DAYS LATER!!! So, come on! It-is BEST,
That you just march-yourself-back-in-there – to-FINALLY ‘Rest in Peace,’
And – DON’T COME BACK AND SCARE US!! You-owe-us-that-much, at-least,
To NOT cause-us all this tre-m-bl-ing, fearing (you-know) that you,
Have returned from (like) some Pet Sematary! This’ll-be THE BEST THING TO DO!”
So, Jesus, a little bewildered, but realizing how wise she was,
Said: “Of course, you’re right, Mary! I’ll head back there! back IN, just- because!”
(As you can see) Mary was a pretty head-strong dame,
And liked to honor tradition, but REALLY – just LOVED “The Game,”
THE GAME called: “Second Guessing” EVERY ABLE-BODIED MAN IN TOWN;
If-THEY didn’t go along with her she’d wear an awful frown,
And say: “You don’t respect me – or listen to my good advice!”
So, (pause) WHAT-IF this had really happened, and Jesus had taken his SPICE,
SOAKED WRAPPING CLOTHS – and gone back, for to die?
In The-Tomb-of-Sorrow! Well, now, wouldn’t it make us cry?
And The Moral of The Story? is: Don’t always listen to-those,
Who-always-urge-reversal-of-plans, because, you-know, I do suppose,
THAT YOUR WAY MIGHT BE A GOOD WAY TOO!
“Her Way or The Highway!” may-not always be the best thing to do!
“Yet, be gentle! when you encounter – A-compulsive De-vil’s Ad-vo-cate! – – – With a mild manner (pause) & a little smile It’s-OK! to-just say: ‘YOU’RE FULL OF S – -T!’ ” The Mystic Poet fin <3