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“THE 4% SOLUTION?!” a poem, a.k.a.: “In Defense of The Catholic Church!” posted: September 9, 2019 (Monday)

“THE 4% SOLUTION?!” a poem, a.k.a.: “In Defense of The Catholic Church!” posted: September 9, 2019 (Monday)

The Church speak-eth:

“We’re NO darned better AND no blessED worse, Than other population groups in The-Multi-Verse! We’re The Catholic Church-reps – and we’re NOT s- x per-verts!

(because) ONLY 4% OF OUR PRIESTS ARE ‘GROPERS’ & THE DIOCESE ASSERTS: That ‘Given OTHER-groups, Churches-The-Boy-Scouts-School-Teachers-and-Kiwan-(u)is] – WELL, they-have-4%-of-THEIR-people-SEXUALLY-RE-PORTED, so-don-be-so-hard-n-us!!! ‘ ] ONLY 4% OF OUR SHEPHERDS – stoop – to feel-and-smooch!] WE’RE NO WORSE THAN OTHERS – ONLY 4% of US – like-to COOCH! Thus, THE MAJORITY OF CATHOLICS, leaders and lay – ARE BEYOND RE-PROACH!] So, why go around suing and bad-mouthing CATHOLIC PRIESTS?”

[One response:] “Well, JESUS IS-YOUR-COACH!]

And, sure, it might be you get sued a lot, but YOU ALL HAVE LOTS OF MONEY!

Doesn’t that suggest – You aught-to-be-a-lot more careful – about kissing Little Sonny?

And, regardless of The 4% Statistic, YOU ARE: THE CHURCH UN-I-VERSAL,

So, Catholics are held to a high, high standard! Like-you-say: THIS-IS-NO-DRESS-RE-HEARSAL!

So, GIRD UP YOUR LOINS! BUT NOT TOO HIGH; KEEP-IT-DOWN,

‘Cause you KNOW you’re under scrutiny! Why The Frown?

Plus, celibacy-is-YOUR-THING, and also your-rites-of-Priesthood,

Which say: DON’T MOLEST KIDS! (pause) Maybe you should,

NOT MAKE APOLOGIES AND ARGUMENTS FOR YOUR PRIESTS,

Just STOP – The S- x u – l Encounters!

LET’S A L L STOP ACTING LIKE BEASTS,

Focus LESS ON s – x AND MORE ON KARAOKE,

And getting sun and exercise –

We’ll spend LESS TIME IN THE POKEY!”

fin ♥

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By @peacewriter51

Life is like a bunch of roses. Some sparkle like raindrops. Some fade when there's no sun. Some just fade away in time. Some dance in many colors. Some drop with hanging wings. Some make you fall in love. The beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Life you can be sure of, you will not get out ALIVE.(sorry about that)