- “THE GARDEN OF EDEN IS KNOWN BY MANY NAMES!” a poem, August 8, 2019 (Thursday) to celebrate “Yakov’s Feast,” an ancient Sikh* and Jewish festival, observed every year on the second Thursday of the month of August.**
A scholar named Jack*** found-an-ancient man-u-script,
It-was-of Sikh* origin; in a dungeon it was kept!
The translation was not easy, and the paper bore the mark,
Of the letters “WH;” they were stamped-in, deep and dark!
Translation: “The GARDEN-OF-EDEN is beneath your nose, in reach!
This-is-what we of The Ancient Sikh Orders – have always tried-to-teach!
But, who, verily? who? can-find This Paradise?
IF-you-must seek for God, TAKE-YOUR-SPOUSE, but in-dis-guise!”
A MAN OF GOD, like-Jack! may-search-for-The-Garden [of Eden] all-his-life!
Our Brother Jack heeded-“the-call,” and, of course, he took his wife!
So, Jack-and-his-spouse – went-to-The-Orient, to-The Himalayan Peaks,
To the Middle Eastern deserts, where they found a tribe of Sikhs!
They-were-a-group of-nomadic zealots, who-grew-such-long, long hair,
And-people-said: “They-know-of-The-Garden,” and, of-course, they-dressed quite bare!
“The Garden of Eden,” they did say, “is-MYSTERIOUS, in-deed,
You must find it in a dream!” And – dreams, as-we’ll-see, did-lead,
Our Good Jack on and on; he-would hope, but-also pout,
To find where Adam-and-Eve had been! (His-wife, she-died en-route!)
Desperate and alone, one-night-his-wife came-to-him-in-a-dream:
“Jack!” SHE-said: “You-MUST-marry a-Sikh-woman, named-OBSCENE!”
Well, Obscene, SHE was A Mystic, with a lot of long, blonde hair,
So, Jack-asked-her, about-The Garden: “Is it hidden?” and, of course: WHERE?”
Well, OBSCENE, She-DID-explain to-her-Jack, one-mysterious-night,
That-The-Garden CAN be-found; it’s-close-by, but (often) out of sight!
“You passed it, in The Orient,” She-said; “Close to-The-Hills-of-Nepal;
For it is a Middle-Eastern-anomaly! or: ‘Southern,’ if-you heed the call!
The Sikh women you-and-your-wife-met knew just-where to go,
But ONLY WISE, WISE WOMEN Truly! Truly-KNOW!
BUT-I’LL TELL YOU ‘A-SECRET!’ IT-WAS DISCOVERED A LONG TIME AGO,
BY ANOTHER MAN ALSO-NAMED-‘JACK,’ WHO WAS ALWAYS ON THE GO;
HE DISCOVERED IT 1 NIGHT, AS HE SEARCHED ‘THE DEEP-DARK-SOUTH,’
AND HE CALLED IT: ‘EUREKA!’ THOSE WORDS CAME FROM HIS MOUTH!
HE-DID CALL-IT CORRECTLY, BUT IT’S-KNOWN BY MANY NAMES!
SOMETIMES ‘THE GARDEN OF EDEN. BUT JACK! THE ‘W-H,’ [IT] FLAMES!
IT’S-ALSO: ‘THE DARK HOLE OF CALCUTTA’ & SOMETIMES: ‘COO-CA-CHEW,’
BUT MOST MEN, WHEN THEY SEE IT, THEY’LL SIMPLY GO: ‘Woo-Hoo!’
THAT’S RIGHT, THE GARDEN OF EATIN’ – IS BETWEEN A LADY’S LEGS!
IF SHE’S HEALTHY, THERE-IS-FRUIT-THERE, &-EVEN A-WISE-MAN BEGS,
TO GO BACK TO THE GARDEN! AND FIND HIM THERE ‘THE LORD,’
WHO (IT’S WRITTEN) GUARDS THE-PLACE WITH A BLOODY SWORD!
SO, IT-TAKES A MIGHTY-SWORD, JACK TO-REGAIN ENTRANCE THERE!
GOOD-PENETRATION IS THE SECRET!” She threw-back-her-long, blonde hair!
POST SCRIPT: Clearly, (pause) WOMEN! (pause) know-a-lot of-secret-stuff,
But they do not know everything, although-they’re-often-in-“The-Buff,”
‘Cause they can’t see DOWN UNDER, even with a mirr[o]r,
So guys have an advantage, when-they-gaze down in-ther’!
For-instance, Jack, when-he’s-under the influence of The Holy Spirit,****
Will utter the ancient, unutterable names of God; come-on-now, let’s hear-it:
When he sees that good-ol’ Obscene V-J, he just naturally goes: “Woo-Hoo,”
Which roughly translated into Hebrew is: “YAHOO!” or “Yah! Woo-oo-oo!”
So, NOW YOU KNOW, all those searches you did, with The outmoded Yahoo Engine,
Were just A SEARCH FOR GOD-and-The-Garden, an ancient, secret legen(d)!
“If Ye Sikh, Ye shall find!” The Mystic Poet
** – This festival is very ancient and includes “merry-making” and prayer. Similar to Christian holidays, like “Ash Wednesday,” ash is applied to the forehead; for Jews, the letters “YH” are inscribed; for The Sikhs, “WH!” Jewish traditions hold the letters “YH,” part of the “Tetragrammaton,” as sacred, whereas Sikhs are obsessed with “WH!” Both sets of letters are considered ancient and sacred. No one is certain what they mean, but they somehow represent The Name of God, uttered only upon “pain of death.” Inscribing them on one’s forehead area, “The 3rd Eye” of Hindu tradition, has special meaning.
*** – Jack Lowenstein, curator for The National Library of Israel:
**** – Latin: “nju-mines hilarus”
MORAL: “So-remember-George-&-Peter – Dick and also Jack,
IF-you’ve-a-friend, kinda-obscene, with-open-legs, Divinity-you’ll-never-lack!”